Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Steamy Dreaming

Ah, pregnancy hormones! Almost every time I close my eyes for some sweet, fleeting slumber I am accosted. Accosted with images of middle school crushes all grown up, pediatricians, random political figures. 


Not only are they naked, but I'm there. Oh, and I'm naked, too. And usually engaged in some sort of behavior I would never, in one thousand years, even think about attempting with my pediatrician. Things I didn't even know about back when I was crushing on Brian in middle school. Maneuvers that would get even the smallest of local politicians in the national news. 

I would give anything for a nice, regular dream about my kids or my husband! Something weird and random, like everyone having broccoli for ears, would be a nice change of pace. I think at this point I would even take the 'taking a test I didn't study for' anxiety dream over the endless x-rated visions I'm having currently. 

Because it's exhausting, really, being the star of a p0rn0 that runs daily from about 10pm until 7am. I wake up needing a nap. And a shower. 

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Arizaphale said...

Bwahahahahahahahaha. That's us girls. Slave to the Hormones!
btw: word verification is trolless. Perhaps I should say something despicable and mean at this point? Naaaaaaaah. Too busy laughing at you and the pediatrician!!!!!!!!

Lora said...

ha! well, try to enjoy it at least a little.

Stacy said...

OMG I totally remember those types of dreams. All I wanted was a few normal dreams for pete's sakes LOL!