Wednesday, January 20, 2010


We're back at home and Sam is off to school. Lucy is sick and Maggie is covered in a head-to-toe rash. I didn't work out once during our trip to western PA, and I consumed about 4,000 calories each day, so I'm kind of back to square one as far as my 30 Day Shredding is concerned. But I'm looking forward to getting back on track.

In the meantime, let me regale you with a cautionary tale about traveling alone with children...

On our drive to my parents' house we made one stop. The PA Turnpike has several completely new rest stops that have big, private family restrooms. If I'm going to haul all three kids to the potty, these are the stops I seek out. Plus, they all have Starbucks, and Sam is now old enough to carry a coffee for mom when my hands are full with Maggie and Lucy.

Unfortunately, the process is still quite long. Between feeding and changing Maggie and then getting Sam to pee, the whole thing took almost 40 minutes. The lengthiest portion of the program is getting the kids in and out of the rest stop. All of the unbuckling and re-buckling and hand-holding and toilet interference running takes for-ev-er.

On our way home I was determined not to stop. I can make it the whole way without a bathroom break, and so can Sam. Maggie, however, can't always last. We had just passed the last of the fancy-schmancy new rest stops, and the sign said that the next rest area was not for 58 miles, when she began screaming. She wailed for the next 58 miles almost non-stop. I finally got to the rest area and it was the total pits. I decided that I was going to feed her and change her in the car, and as long as Sam didn't have to pee, we'd just keep on moving.

But as soon as I stood up, I realized that I had to pee. I was parked all the way in the back of the lot for privacy, and I didn't feel like schlepping all of them into the dingy rest area. I had heard stories of other using their children's' diapers in emergency situations, and I had an old size 5 diaper from Lucy tucked into the pocket of the door.

You can see where this is going, can't you?

So, in the back of my mini-van I attempted to pee into a diaper. And I was successful...mostly. I somewhat overestimated the capacity of a size 5 pampers, or I underestimated the amount of urine I had in me. So there was a little teeny bit of spillage. Enough that I had to sit on a blanket to protect my leather seats.

I was thinking that once I got home I would run inside to change before anyone saw me. Except that I forgot that it was every other Tuesday. You know, when we have the house cleaned. So instead of running in and changing, I ran in and had to walk around without letting our cleaning lady see my backside. At least I was successful at that.

So the next time, I think I'll deal with the hassle of dragging the kids in with me. Or buy some depends.

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Chrissie said...

I guess the diaper peeing was bound to happen at some point. Great story Amy...glad you survived!

Megan said...

you are cracking me up. probably not as funny when it was happening, eh?

Cara said...

Amy Jo I was crying reading the part where you used the diaper. I had never though of it put sure have been in situation where I wished I had one. Glad you are all home and in one piece. Thanks again for the laugh I really needed that!